Thursday, May 5, 2011

Getting to Know God

March 1, 2011.  An easy date to remember.  Up early.  Drove with a friend and her daughter and my Ashley to Denver.  Lunch in Monument.  Kohl's.  Doctor's appointment.  Cast.  Dinner with friends.  Back to the Hotel.

The hotel.  That's when I started feeling yucky.  Like a bad cold coming on.

Up early the next day for the Baby's appointments.  Yeah for GPS!  Not lost once!  Then back to Children's for the CP clinic - not planned but a good thing.  Listen.  Wait.  Talk.  Listen.  Wait.  Exhausted.  Drove to a bookstore.  Saw friends.  Dinner at Qdoba.  Ice cream at Cold Stone.  Back to the Hotel.  So tired!

Drive home.  Cough.  Sniff.

Next day.  Worse.

Flu, I thought.

Nope.  RSV.  Respiratory syncytial virus. Bad news for me. 

May 1st, started coughing again.  Yucky stuff.

God and I have been doing some serious talking.  I've got things to do!  I've spent too much time down!  My kids need me.  My friends and I have plans.  I have two classes at church to organize.  My husband would like to see me awake in the evenings and not passed out from exhaustion, medications - or both!

A friend just asked me, "What has God been saying?"

"Shhh.  Peace.  Be still.  Know me.  Knowing me is more important than anything!"

I am seeing that without illness, as frightening and inconvenient as it may be, I would never know God as my healer.  Without need, I would never know him as my provider.  Without trials I would never know his great mercy.  I would not lean on him.  I would be sufficient in myself.

And I am far from self-sufficient!

I need Him.  For each breath.  For each movement.  For each day.

I want Him.  Beside me.  Around me.  Surrounding me.  Holding me.

I will trust Him.  He has no plans to harm me.  Only to draw me closer to His side.

What is God saying to you?  Are you listening?

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