Mean Momma

Okay, I am not up for any Mother of the Year award this year.  In fact, a Mean Momma award would probably garnish me nominations from my family.

I've been testy and edgy;  short tempered, shorter fused;  high strung and have left a trail of blood behind me.  Maybe that's an exaggeration - a little.

Part of it is allergies.  They are horrible this year!  And the meds that don't really seem to help leave me groggy and fussy.

Part of it is spring fever and adjusting to being together 24/7.  I love teaching my kids but I've not had a break in a while.  Yesterday, I went to my room and shut the door - for 4 hours!  I read some and took a nap.

Partly, I miss my friends from work greatly.  I  miss that daily interaction and our wordsmith session.  I miss the coffee and lunch.  And yes, I occassionally  miss the paycheck!

And a big part this past week is looking at another surgery for Ashley.  The screws should come out on Friday.  But, are they doing to do anything else?  Seems like they always find something else they can tweak, change, inject, stretch, lengthen, fuse or just plain play with.   Fourteen hours of driving - half of which you hope she doesn't have a seizure or throw up.

Frankly, I think I've been a pill because I don't want to be the adult this week.  I want to be the kid!  I want someone else to take care of this.  I miss my dad.  I want to curl up in his lap like I'm still 5 and the whole world is quiet and peaceful.

So, I go to my Father.  I curl up in his lap.  Father God, make this all go away!  No, he answers, but I will go through it with you.

Yup, here come the tears.

"Bring all your needs to the altar,
Bring all your needs to the Lord;
He is so willing and able to help you,
Bring all your needs to the Lord."

Here they are God.  My needs are not neat.  My problems aren't tied in a nice bundle.  They are not pretty, but I can't keep them any longer.  Here they are.   You are willing.  You are able.  I'm not.

Phillippians 4:7 reads:

"Then God's peace, which goes beyond anything we can imagine, will guard your thoughts and emotions through Christ Jesus."   God's Word Translation


or another translation:

"And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."  King James

In our time of trial, God's peace will keep our thoughts and emotions calm! 

I will rest in Him!  In this time of unrest - so many friends are hurting and facing trials - I will take their name before the Father. 

There's plenty of room in His lap for all of us!

P.S. - Yes, I have apologized to my family.  They voted that mom needs more sleep and less Benadryl!

Little Moments

After the bustle of the past 5 mionths, the hurry of packing and traveling for surgeries and tournaments, and then playing 4 soccer games in two days, the kids and I headed to the pool this evening. We played tag, Marco Polo, and just enjoyed general silliness. After a bit, I headed to the hot tub (oh, yeah) and watched the kids continue to play together.

I was amazed to think that I gave birth to those two wonderful creatures! Being their mom is such a joy. Not always easy, but always done with much love. Their laughter just makes me smile from the inside out! Their smiles warm my heart. I am a most-blessed mom.

We've settled into the room, following Papa John's pizza with the grandparents at the lobby tables - love Drury Inn's free pop and coffee and tea service available 24/7! Kids are tired. It's been quite a roller coaster since last October.

But we're still here. No one jumped off the ride, we just buckled our belts and hung on to each other. I am very blessed that through everything life has given us, the four of us have clung together, prayed together, laughed together and sometimes cried together.

A peace just settles over my soul. I'm sitting at the computer, they are each in a bed and it is quiet. We miss their daddy - did I mention this family likes to be together? God will keep him safe and we'll see him next Saturday!

Together. What a beautiful word.

4.5 Minutes to Improve Your Day

This week has been, hmmm, busy. Yesterday, my stress level topped out and left me in tears in the middle of Wal Mart ready to pounce on the poor woman who had the misfortune to stand behind me at the lettuce counter. Every nerve as wound as tight as a soldier moments before battle.

Today it has been replaced with melancoly. Fatigue.

Then I visited my email and a dear friend had sent this link. It helped me. It will you too.

So, grab a cup of tea, sit down, turn up the wound and listen. . . . . .

http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid271552717?bctid=1913313052

Cold Season Emerges!

It all started with David. Normally the kids bring it home, but this time it was him. Then I had the sore throat, runny nose, cough, ickiness all over. We drove to Grand Junction - the four of us sharing air in one vehicle. We checked into a hotel. One bathroom. Two beds. One breathing space.

Crawling into bed Friday night, I wondered why I had come.

Then Saturday I felt better. Sunday even better. Stood under a tent in the drizzle and watched Chris play some great ball.

Drove home Sunday. The long way through Moab in case the snow on the passes proved thick. It was only an hour further and a gorgeous drive!

Home safe. Laundry started. Nice dinner with Chris and Kayle.

Monday morning - Chris is sick. Same stuff.

Zinc lozenges. Zicam swabs. Vitamin C. Lots of water. Chicken soup. Nose sprays. Vicks.

Monday night - he feels better.

Good! I had a million things on my calendar for Tuesday - Parent Meeting; Telephone Conference; Book Fair; Spreadsheet to prepare; Parent-Teacher Conference.

Tuesday morning - Ashley is sick. Yup. Same stuff.

Here we go again.

My plans were derailed. Plans that I thought were on my "trail" (see earlier posts). I guess my calendar was the detour and being mom and at home was my path the past two days. I'm fortunate that my work allows me to be at home. Research can happen anyhere and reports can be typed at home. Days like these make me a better advocate for families - if it's hard for me imagine the single mom working and supporting kids and not having the option to miss work for the day; or the two income family barely making it and illness has used all their sick days.

Lord, thanks for this Trail today. I'm enjoying the view. Not that I want my kids sick, but there's still great conversations and loving moments and teachable times in illness. Father God, please take away this illness from our home - it's made the rounds and we're done! But mostly, thanks for the peace that comes despite the sickness. You are indeed awesome. K